Today I tried to understand quantum physics and multiverse theory. Apparently, in an alternate universe, I actually succeeded.

"Deja-view" is a real condition, and it affects millions of people every year while witnessing repeat winners at The Emmys. Do not be alarmed. The sensation will pass. Just focus on Sherlock and Fargo!

Being a grown up means making the really tough life decisions. Like choosing just one Muppet-related T-shirt to take with me on a trip.

A Screen Between

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I’m pretty sure the secret to happiness is never reading inspirational quotes. Unless they’re written in pizza. And you read with your mouth.

Not-So-Instant G.B.F.

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It’s important to have the right perspective on things. I mean, if we saw the movie BIG from the perspective of Josh’s mom, it would actually be a terrifying story of a woman whose son has seemingly been abducted and is now taunting her with Stockholm Syndrome-like letters about how this has actually been good for him.

Pavlov’s Doorbell

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The Ass Is Always Greener

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If my external life were even half as active as my internal life, I’d need a personal assistant and two naps per day.